


thick thighs save lives

by skeletalparade (boythighs)



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Bad Pick-Up Lines, Canon Compliant, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-02
Updated: 2017-05-02
Packaged: 2018-10-27 02:47:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,354
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10800096
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/boythighs/pseuds/skeletalparade
Summary: Daichi is going in to spike the ball, hands clasped and extended before him, eyebrows set with determination as the ball comes flying his way. The bend of his knees supports his weight as he sinks into a grounding position, and from somewhere behind him comes Noya’s voice,“Thick thighs save lives, Daichi-san!”And his concentration takes a swan dive, his resolution broken, balance lost as the ball evades his teetering posture.





	thick thighs save lives

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ShadowofEckhart](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShadowofEckhart/gifts).



> a huge thank you to [ShadowofEckhart](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShadowofEckhart/pseuds/ShadowofEckhart) for commissioning this piece! i recently had to take up some due to a very bad, abusive situation concerning my living arrangements, and i could not be more grateful for them and their help. 
> 
> it's been a hot minute since i wrote for the haikyuu!! fandom, but i really do hope you enjoy this. i had a lot of fun writing it for you.

Daichi, if asked, could pinpoint the exact moment that things in his life had started to get, for the lack of a better term, _weird_. He’d liked to think that for the most part he was a relatively normal guy, with a relatively normal life, and it wasn’t like anything had taken his whole world and rattled it to its core. Nothing quite so dramatic, really. But things definitely could not be considered the same degree of average as what he had previously signified with, not after everything that had begun to transpire.

So they’re in practice one day, and everything is _normal_. They’re smacking the ball over the net because they have an important game coming up, and Daichi wants to make sure that they’re flowing together in all the right ways, all the ways any good (or even half decent) team should be working together in order to function as a unit rather than disjointed parts of a whole _mess_. Things are still hard with the first years since they don’t quite have their acts together yet, but Daichi, as always, has faith in what the Karasuno team is destined to become.

Daichi is going in to spike the ball, hands clasped and extended before him, eyebrows set with determination as the ball comes flying his way. The bend of his knees supports his weight as he sinks into a grounding position, and from somewhere behind him comes Noya’s voice,

“Thick thighs save lives, Daichi-san!”

And his concentration takes a swan dive, his resolution broken, balance lost as the ball evades his teetering posture. When his legs hit the ground it is with an audibly painful _THUMP_. Daichi emits a low, aggravated groan, the darker complexion of his skin flaring crimson and his head whipping around to look at Noya, eyeing the grin on his face with venom. Behind the second year, Tsukishima is cupping his hand over his mouth to hide mischievous laughter, and next to him Asahi looks mortified, fearing for Noya’s life with an arm extended as if to hold his stupid, foolish friend back, and his skin gone pale.

“Noya-kun,” Daichi growls, “What on _earth_?”

The gym feels thick with Daichi’s embarrassment, everyone's eyes bouncing tumultuously back and forth between himself and Noya, who now has his hands on his hips and refuses, to Daichi’s utter dismay, to look even slightly apologetic. The hole digs itself deeper as Noya crouches down to mimic Daichi’s previous stance, smirk growing and growing and growing until Daichi thinks he might be in danger of it swallowing his little body whole.

“It’s the flex of your thighs, Daichi-san!” Noya says, laughing brightly. “They’re majestic!”

The desire for an early grave barrels over Daichi like a freight train, the sound of laughter (Tsukishima? Hinata, too, maybe, and _definitely_ Tanaka) ringing out into the air of the room and filling in the empty lines of seats above them. Coach Ukai, silent until now, probably from the same pure shock that colors Daichi’s entire body with heat and ghastly mortification, coughs and orders for Noya to take twenty laps outside for disrupting practice. Noya doesn’t fight him, doesn’t even look ashamed as he strolls over to the doors of the gym, and as he rolls it aside, he takes one last look at his team captain and smacks the back of his own thighs, Ukai roaring at him to _go_.

And all Daichi can think is that if the floor opened up like a demonic mouth to swallow him up right now, he wouldn’t mind, not even a little.

**

After the event, the evidence of his embarrassment never quite fades when he’s around Noya, when he sees him in the halls at school and withers under the underclassman’s cheeky grins, and Noya never stops making the lewd comments. In fact, they become more frequent, and the risque nature of them grows increasingly more-so.

“Your ass could have its own area code, Daichi-san!”

“Daichi-san, has anyone ever told you that you look like a porn star?”

“Is that a stick in your pants, Daichi-san, or are you just happy to see me?”

Today, the second Daichi sees Noya at the other of the hall, talking animatedly to Tanaka, Daichi snags Suga by his wrist and drags him down an adjacent hallway to avoid the two of them. Suga, who continues to be amused by their underclassman and his antics, laughs at Daichi with reckless abandon.

“It isn’t funny.” Daichi hisses as they walk down the hall, skin feeling red-hot. He absolutely loathes how flustered this all has been making him, but he must admit that slowly he is becoming… more accustomed to it, more capable to turn his cheek (flaming though they are) and simply ignore the mirthful second year and his audience of laughing buffoons. Doesn’t mean he enjoys it, though.

“It’s a little funny,” Suga replies with a grin, the goddamn sadist, clutching his lunch closer to his chest when they begin to descend down the staircase at the end of the hall, void of all other human life aside from them. “You could just ask him to stop if it bothers you that much, you know.”

Daichi shoots him a bewildered look. “I think you underestimate just how tenacious Noya is, which is, quite frankly, shocking to me.”

Suga laughs again and pushes the door open, gray hair tethered away from his face by the wind as it welcomes them to the open courtyard. Students from various years commingle on the grass and dirt, a group of unfamiliar boys gathered around a game of cards directly to the left of the door. Suga’s voice is soft as he responds this time. “I don’t think he would keep egging you on if he knew just how much it was bugging you, though. He’s a pest, but a friendly, understanding pest.”

They make their way to a more barren place at the far end of the building, sitting down with backs pressed to the worn stone of the school. Suga unwraps the cloth around his lunch, popping the container open and picking up his chopsticks with grace. Daichi sighs and watches him.

“You’re supposed to be my best friend. Where’s your sympathy, huh?”

Suga chuckles around a mouthful of rice, speaking only after he’s swallowed, the tone of his voice informing Daichi that he is still oh-so amused by everything. God, how can someone so kind also be such a menace?

“Daichi, I think the issue isn’t that Noya is bothering you.” He jabs his chopsticks at Daichi, who flinches back, feeling just as confused as he looks. Suga’s grin only widens, the crinkling corners of his eyes giving Daichi an increasingly bad feeling. “I think the problem here is that secretly, deep down, you actually _don’t_ feel bothered by him.”

 _What_?

“What?”

All of Suga’s attention returns to his food and he shrugs, refusing to say anything more and leaving Daichi with nothing but racing thoughts that lead him in circles. He takes out his own lunch, packed with significantly less care than Suga’s own, and devotes himself to it in a fugue state while his brain runs rampant with the notion of what Suga has implied. And the more he thinks about it, the more the thoughts plague him, the more inclined he is to agree with Suga. Noya’s comments don’t bother him because they _bother_ him, they bother him because they aren’t as much of a nuisance, as annoying, as overbearing as Daichi wishes they were.

What has his life even become?

**

Hinata and Kageyama are the last to leave the gym that afternoon, shoving at each other’s shoulders and arms as they race out the door, loud, bickering words echoing, lingering around the corners of the high walls in the gym as the doors slide shut behind them. The act of clearing up the practice net is left to Suga and Daichi, who work together to get it done quickly while passing words about some homework they’re both slightly perplexed by. Daichi does feel the teensiest bit more confident in his understanding of the material as they put the net away in the storage closet, nudging an empty bucket out of their path as they exit the tiny room again. Daichi flips the lights off when they reach the doors, Suga bidding him farewell as he heads in the direction opposite of where Daichi needs to go.

Daichi is digging around in his bag for the keys to the gym that Ukai had passed along before leaving himself not long ago, so busy shuffling through his belongings that the presence at his back goes unnoticed until Daichi has finally locked up and turned around to find that-

Noya is hiked up on the railing lining the walkway that leads back to the main school building. Daichi’s hands stutter as they slide the key into his pocket this time, counting on it to be less likely to get lost. His heart is pounding in his chest, a healthy mixture of shock and… something indiscernible.

“Oh, Noya-kun. I didn’t know you were still here.” The sound of his voice is laced with an emotion that takes Daichi by surprise.

Is that _nervousness_ in his words?

Noya has an awfully bashful expression on his face, Daichi notes, uncomfortable with the way it looks so foreign and out of place on Noya. The second year’s boisterous personality, loud voice, and happy-go-lucky demeanor have always set him apart, so this vulnerability is not something Daichi can say he’s ever expected of him.

The shuffle of Daichi’s feet is uncertain as he watches the way Noya’s jaw works behind his closed mouth, devoid of his usual grin.

“Were you… did you need something?” Daichi tries talking again, clearing his throat mid-sentence to try and reign in his normal tone. The success of it is dubious at best. Noya finally looks at him, removing his eyes from the spot way off in the distance they’d been trained on up until this point. When their eyes meet, Daichi becomes aware that his skin feels hot, stomach twisting in knots.

“I wanted to ask you something.” Noya says, swaying his feet back and forth, the heels of them clinking against the metal railing, propelled forward again by it, setting them into a cycle of motion that Noya distracts himself with to stall. Daichi must admit that he is not at all bothered by the fact that Noya seems so driven to prolong the silence. He’s not sure if he has the wits about him right now to carry on a full conversation.

Which is weird. It’s so weird, and Daichi cannot for the life of him figure out what his deal is.

Noya sighs and shakes himself, straightening his posture and sliding off the railing. His hands are tiny fists that rest next to his thighs, his face - his mouth - his eyes - his jaw - locked tight with resolve.

“Daichi-san!” Noya says with sudden confidence, the power of his booming voice making Daichi jump, almost losing grip on the bag hanging loosely off of his shoulder. He barely saves it from falling to the ground, hands scrambling at it as his attention remains fully on Noya, impossible to disturb.

“Please go on a date with me!”

The bag falls.

Daichi stares at his underclassman, eyes wide enough that they might well be taking up the whole of his upper-face. His mouth moves around words that refuse to come, his voice locked tight between the walls of a straining throat. Noya maintains his posture, not relaxing for a second even as Daichi loses all focus on the world around them. This explains the teasing, the jokes, but Daichi can’t seem to wrap his head around Noya being attracted to him. Attracted enough to ask him on a… on a _date_.

“What?” Is all his body can supply him with, the croak of it grating his vocal chords. This is the point where Noya begins to falter, his shoulders sagging in defeat as he mistakes Daichi’s shock for something that it’s not. And it is also the point where Daichi suddenly realizes _exactly_ what Suga had meant by suggesting that he wasn’t all that bothered by any of Noya’s one-liners, which now, given the circumstances, come with much more clarity.

None of it had been meant to bug him - Noya had been _flirting_. The whole. Entire. Time.

The younger boy’s mouth opens, corners of it tilted downwards and the apples of his cheeks colored with bashfulness again, and Daichi knows that Noya is about to take it back, apologize, and while Daichi isn’t wholly sure what his feelings are, he isn’t opposed to testing out the waters.

“Yes.” He rushes to say, mending the awkward tears in the atmosphere around them as Noya’s face shifts from one expression to another, from disappointment, to shock, to elation, smile wide and pleased on his face. There’s a cut at the corner of his lips, one that Daichi watches as it lifts with Noya’s grin, and the libero bounces forward closer to Daichi in excitement, clapping him on the arm. This kid is a tornado of emotions, Daichi thinks, and can’t help but smile himself.

“Great! I’ll text you later tonight so we can hash out all of the details! See you later, Daichi-san!”

He leaves Daichi with zero opportunity to respond as he bounds off, Tanaka stepping ‘round the corner of the building as Noya comes closer to it. Daichi sighs, unsurprised that Tanaka had known all along, watching the two of them as they high-five and have a boisterous moment of raucous cheering for what Noya must be playing off as a total self-victory. Second years.

As he’s scooping up his backpack and the errant pens and papers that had spilled out of it upons its floor-collision, Daichi ponders ways to break this news to Suga. That he has a date. With Noya. Then he groans, rolling his eyes, because man does he hate it when Suga ends up being right on the money.

**Author's Note:**

> you can find me over on [twitter](https://twitter.com/volghiras) if you'd like to chat. my commissions are currently closed, but i'll probably be opening them up again sometime within the next month. thanks so much for reading.


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